Greetings from the couch
in the parlor
in the house
on the mountain.
It’s spring here
just like it was last year
and the year before,
bringing migrating birds
and blossoms that may freeze
or may not.
It doesn’t matter all that much,
the deer eat the flowers anyway.
Two anomalies:
we have migrating Baltimore Orioles this year
and the oak leaves
are over two weeks late.
But the frogs still peep.
The turkeys still gobble.
I still procrastinate.
Upon waking,
I still pray the Lord’s Prayer.
For years we have joked
that our home is the perfect place
to hide out from the world.
It’s surreal to think that
that’s actually what we are doing
because not all that much is different.
Our shelves have always been stocked.
We have extra staples
so we don’t need a trip to town:
flour,
sugar,
eggs,
milk,
sugar,
eggs,
milk,
and dark chocolate almonds.
Eleven miles both ways saves a gallon of gas.
We already were hand washers
and sometimes washed to the songs
playing in our heads.
For Denny it usually is Crosby, Stills, and Nash.
For me, today it was Bob Dylan’s
“The Times, They Are A’Changin’”
“The Times, They Are A’Changin’”
but I don’t really like Dylan
so I switched to Michael Card’s
“I Will Bring You Home.”
We were already unemployed
and by that I mean retired.
The days of the week
were already mostly meaningless.
Weather is more important in how we spend our days—
if it’s raining,
we work inside.
Dry?
Outside.
We already had relatively low standards of dress,
comfy and practical,
that prompt us to
start pajama time in the late afternoon.
Masks do not bother us—
masks are actually a relief
because you aren’t expected
to recognize people in masks,
a plus for people with prosopagnosia
or “face blindness.”
That would be Sue and Brad Pitt.
We are not dependent on beauticians.
Sue has cut her own hair for decades*
and often trims Denny’s hair
and his eyebrows.
Denny would not need sunscreen
if his eyebrows were allowed to run wild.
We were already receiving virtual hugs
and video visits.
We can have LEGO adventures
with the grandgirls in Taiwan
without even bending over.
We still see a lot of friends on Sunday mornings,
though now they sit in Zoom boxes
instead of pews.
Gary Magee still makes us laugh.
We hear of people using pandemic time to clean closets;
Denny already cleaned his closet regularly
to make room for the wild comfy shirts
that Sue used to bring him on Mondays
upon return from Goodwill.
Only 79c!
He is a zealous cleaner.
He even threw out Sue’s chicken suit.
“It was an accident.”
We rarely attended sporting events or concerts.
We already were spending too much time online.
We already distrusted governmental decision-making.
I had hoped that the current situation
would help to develop a daily habit of flossing
since our dentist office has been closed
since our dentist office has been closed
but, alas, tooth maintenance hasn’t changed.
I do drive more slowly, though.
When you don’t get off the mountain often,
there is so much to see!
Every trip becomes a field trip,
with detours for swamps
and eagle nests
and trilliums
and heron rookeries.
I also drive more slowly
because of that whole “avoid the hospital” thing.
(That was good advice
even before 2020.)
I also keep hand sanitizer in the Jeep,
something I have never done before.
I am still theoretically against hand sanitizer,
but it seems prudent currently.
Here on the mountain,
we are hardly aware of inaudible crashings
and foundational changes
in the world as we knew it.
But we sometimes step in mudholes of grief,
stumble into ditches of fear,
take deep breaths that turn into sobs,
and get homesick for a lap to climb into.
Then we remember Michael Card
singing the words of God:
“In this fearful fallen place
I will be your home.”
We recommend finding a comfy couch,
settling in,
and listening to Michael’s comforting voice--
or you could go to a sink
and scrub your hands.
When the music fades,
you will be clean enough for a snack.
We recommend dark chocolate almonds.
When the music fades,
you will be clean enough for a snack.
We recommend dark chocolate almonds.
“I Will Bring You Home”
by Michael Card
*Sue's haircut video may be seen on FaceBook, April 3, 2020
